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Ever Wonder What It’s Like To Raise Twins?

Ever Wonder What It’s Like To Raise Twins?

Written by Eric Newman

Here are some truths and myths about raising multiples. Not venting, just setting the record straight.

(Okay, I’m venting a little.)

1. What people will tell you: It’s easy to get twins on a schedule in which they go to sleep and wake up at the same time.

The reality: Pshaw! One wakes up, the other falls asleep. They alternate around the clock… and they do it on purpose, I tell you!

2. What people will tell you: Twins are really only 1.5 times the work. I mean making a bottle for two is just as easy as making it for one. And when you finish changing one’s diaper, you just slide him over and change the other’s diaper. And if you are going to take one out for a walk, just get a double stroller and take them together.

The reality: It’s fully double the work. Sure, it’s easy enough to fill two bottles, but there then there are two bottles to clean. As for the diaper assembly line–there are still 2 butts to wipe (constantly). And about that double stroller–better start working out, cause you’ll need all the muscle you got and then some to shove that thing around town. Now compound all this extra twins work with the exhaustion you’ll feel from never, ever sleeping. Ever (See #1).

3. What people will tell you: You don’t have to worry about mixing up your identical twins. Within days, parents will notice differences in how the babies look, how they act, even in the tenor of their cries.

The reality: Pretty sure our boys have changed identities at least twice a week for each of the 32 weeks of their lives thus far. And even if they did look and act differently, I’d be too woozy with exhaustion to ever take note (See #1).

4. What people will tell you: One twin will undoubtedly become the “evil” one–the rebel, the troublemaker, the imp.

The reality: Jury is still out. I’ll tell you this though, at 4am on any given day, whichever one is shrieking is the evil one.

5. What people will tell you: Feeding two at once can be tricky.

The reality: It’s a cinch, folks.  Just lay your twins out on the floor. Pop those rubber nipples in their mouths, stuff a towel under each of their chins, and prop up those bottles. Play “Angry Birds Star Wars” to your heart’s delight as the force of gravity nourishes your children.

6. What people will tell you: Twins, such a blessing!

The reality: I used to want to bury my fists deep into the mouth of people who said that. But nowadays when I lie down on the floor and the little twerps coo with delight and crawl (and drool) all over me…

Yes, I feel blessed.  I love these crazy, little guys.


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